Shidduch dating advice can be hard to come by. You want to find the right person, but you don’t want to end up in a relationship that doesn’t work out. Here are some dos and don’ts of a successful relationship to help you find the right one.
Do have goals
Have specific goals for your shidduchim to help guide you. This doesn’t mean that you have to set yourself rigid goals, but rather you can set yourself a few easy-to-achieve things to work towards. For example, if you want to meet more people, start with making a list of your friends and family members you would like to meet and invite them to your next family gathering. If you want to grow closer to your partner, put a goal on your list to take them to the movies once a month or spend more time together by doing activities you both love.
Increase Your Knowledge
We all learn differently, but how you learn can have a huge impact on your future. If you learn best through reading, consider enrolling in a free online course that will help you learn more about a relationship. There are plenty of options, and learning more about yourself and how to communicate can be a great asset in your relationship.
Learn A New Skill
We all have a hidden skill that we’d love to learn, but never find the time. Pick one thing that you’ve always wanted to learn and practice it every day. Your partner is sure to notice your new skill. It will make you feel more confident and you might even be able to wow your friends. Try practicing a new skill every week to keep your brain sharp and to help you meet more singles!
Create A New Habit
As we are learning, it is important to create a new habit of being in tune with your partner so that there is less pressure on you to guess what they want or need, and for you to be spontaneous. As you become more comfortable in your relationship, you can create new habits such as going on dates every other week or scheduling dates in your calendar for the week. Creating a new habit is a way to show your partner that you are committed to them and that you love spending time with them.
Improve Your Health
A healthy body is the basis for a healthy mind. We all know it. But so many people put unhealthy things in their bodies, from processed foods to drugs. If you want to meet someone who is healthy physically and mentally, focus on improving your health. Eat healthy foods, take vitamins and get moderate exercise. You will feel better and be much more attractive.
Do learn to say no
To help you practice saying no to your dates when you’re not interested, make a list of things that you absolutely have to have in order to feel like you’re getting your needs met in a relationship and a list of things that you can let go of to make room for a romantic partner to care about you as an individual and not just as a person who can provide them with sex or with companionship. This can be a great way to help you have more control over your romantic relationships and help you learn how to say no to people who don’t meet your needs.
Learn To Say No To Friends Who Ask You To Do Things You Don’T Want To Do
If you don’t want to do something, it’s important to have the confidence to say no to friends who pressure you into it. While it’s important to be a friend to others, you also need to be a friend to yourself. If you’re not comfortable doing something, say no. Your friends may not understand why you’re refusing, but that’s because you don’t owe them explanations. After all, you’re the one who is responsible for your actions.
Learn To Say No To Activities That You Don’T Enjoy
It can be very tempting to say yes to everyone who wants to take you out for coffee or go dancing, but remember that you need to set boundaries with people you date. Don’t say yes to an activity unless you know you will enjoy it and have time to spare. Set aside time to focus on yourself and find things you really love doing rather than just trying to fit in with everyone else. When you are intentional about your time, you’ll be much happier in the long run.
Learn To Say No To Activities You Know You Won’T Enjoy Just Because Someone Else Is Pressuring You
It’s easy to say yes when you are trying to please others, and, when you do, you end up sacrificing what you really want—and what you deserve. If you’re looking for a relationship that will last, you need to learn how to say no to activities you don’t want to do because they aren’t something you’re into at all. You don’t owe anyone your time, attention or energy, so be firm but kind when you say no. And if someone’s pressuring you into something you don’t want to do or spend time with people you don’t like, be honest about your feelings and set boundaries.
Do know what you want
It’s important to know what you want in a relationship. Everybody has different priorities when it comes to a relationship and what they want. For example, one person may be looking for someone who shares the same passion as them while another person may want to date someone who they can have an intellectual connection with. In order to know what you want in a relationship, you need to take some time to think about what your priorities are and what type of relationship you want.
Do You Want A Plain Wedding Or One With A Little More Pizzazz?
It’s perfectly fine to be a little adventurous and choose a more unique wedding if that’s something you really want. However, some couples opt for simpler, more traditional weddings because they just prefer it. Others feel that a more traditional wedding ceremony gives their relationship more credibility and helps them start off on the right foot. If you’re not sure which route you want to take, don’t feel pressured to pick one right away. Talk to your partner about your thoughts and feelings and let them feel free to share their opinions as well.
Do You Want A Traditional Or Modern Ceremony?
Have you always dreamed of getting married in a white dress or have you always wanted to celebrate in a small, traditional ceremony? Or maybe you are looking to get married in a more casual atmosphere. Whatever your dream wedding is, discuss with your parents and your partner what they would like for you to experience and look forward to.
Do You Want A First Look Or No Photos Before You Walk Down The Aisle?
Just as your parents likely had the same opinion about first looks before marriage in their day, our generation is moving away from the idea of taking wedding photos before the ceremony. Couples who want to get away from the traditional wedding photos opt to have engagement photos taken instead. Getting engaged is a great step in the right direction. It’s a sign that you’re ready to start a life together and can help you create a vision for your wedding. But what about the couples who want to skip the engagement photos altogether?
Do You Want A Destination Wedding Or One Close To Home?
If you want to get married, setting the date is the first step. If you want to get engaged, you can choose when to propose, but the date will set the framework for the rest of your relationship. You might choose to get married on your vacation or at a place where you spent your honeymoon, or you could stick with a location close to home. If you’re the planning type, you might even want to plan an engagement party and a wedding at the same time. Wherever you choose to get married will affect the way you plan activities and make decisions together.
Do be respectful
We all have different beliefs, opinions and values. It’s important to respect others’ thoughts and beliefs, even if you don’t share them. If you don’t respect the way another person thinks, you won’t be able to work together as a team or even as a couple. It’s also important to be honest with each other about what you like and don’t like. This will help you determine what you want and what you’re not looking for in a partner.
Do Ask For Help
Sometimes you may struggle outside of your partner, whether it’s in your relationship with others, at work, or even at school. It is important that you know when you need help—and that you ask for it. If you are struggling with an addiction, don’t just try to deal with it alone. There are plenty of people who want to help and can guide you through treatment. And if you are struggling with depression and anxiety, talk to your doctor about getting medication. And even if you don’t suffer from mental health disorders, it doesn’t hurt to talk to your partner about how you’re feeling. It’s important that your partner knows how to help you and that you ask for help when you need it.
Do Use Correct Grammar, Capitalization, And Punctuation
Using the wrong capitalization or punctuation can be confusing and make you seem uneducated. When sending messages, make sure your spelling is correct and any misspelled words are taken care of by using the auto-correct function on your computer. Also, don’t use all capital letters. Using all caps can be distracting and sometimes even rude.
Do Be Courteous
You don’t want to be overly familiar with your partner when you first meet, especially if you’re a shomer shtieva who’s not used to dating. As you build a relationship, feel free to be more intimate. But, just as you wouldn’t share intimate details with a new acquaintance, don’t talk about your sexual fantasies or past partners in front of your date.
Do Be Kind
Always be kind in your interactions with your parents, your partners, and your friends. If you have a conflict with one of your friends, don’t go around bad-mouthing them or spreading rumors. It will only cause more trouble. If you’re frustrated with one of your parents, talk to them about it in a calm and collected manner. If they still refuse to listen, then you can talk to a counselor. Just remember to be kind to everyone you come across.
Do Be Open To Criticism
If you’re not used to having your opinions questioned (which is a perfectly normal reaction if you’re not used to being in a relationship), a shidduch website can be incredibly challenging. If you’re expecting someone to just believe you, and to not ask questions about where your ideas came from, you’ll be very disappointed. A shidduch website is a great place to practice having a healthy, open discussion about your ideas and beliefs. If the idea of a discussion makes you nervous, consider practicing your discussion skills with a friend before you try online.
Do be yourself
We all like to think that we know ourselves pretty well, but when it comes to dating, we often realize that we’re not quite as sure of ourselves as we think. Your personality and preferences might conflict with those of your potential partner, and you don’t know if you can trust them yet. While it’s important to work on yourself and grow, don’t forget that your partner is also a person who deserves to be treated as an equal. Don’t try to change them because you want to or because you think they’ll make a good match. As long as you both respect and love each other, you can work on improving your relationship together.
Keep Your Professional Style
After all, you’re looking for a partner who can offer you something more than just romantic love. A partner who can offer you a new perspective on the world is someone you want to spend time with and can be a partner for life. Your partner should be able to see the beauty in your personality and love you for you. Don’t try to pretend to be someone you’re not or change your personality to fit into someone else’s idea of what a relationship should be. Instead, keep the aspects of who you are that make you unique and charming, and let those shine through in your interactions with others.
Show Your Personality
If you’re afraid to express your authentic personality or are afraid that you’ll say the wrong thing, you will come off fake during your first dates. Take some time to practice conversations, whether they’re with friends or family, and make sure that you feel comfortable. You don’t want to be fake during your first dates and turn your partner off.
Do What You Love
Sometimes people get involved in a relationship for all the wrong reasons. Maybe you’re looking for a sugar daddy or a sugar mommy to support you financially. Maybe you’re trying to find a partner who will help you discover your passion. When you enter a relationship with someone because of what they can do for you, you put all your focus on them and neglect to focus on yourself. A successful relationship is one in which you put yourself first. Find someone who shares your interests and who treats you with love and respect, and you will have a relationship that will last for a lifetime.
Make Use Of Your Interests
No matter what a shidduch is looking for in a partner, one thing is for sure: they are drawn to people who are different and have interests outside the norm. A shidduch is looking for someone who will challenge them but at the same time be interested in what they like to do. Do not be afraid to try new things and show your partner that you are adventurous! When you’re on a date, try different activities and see what you both enjoy.
Be Careful What You Post
It’s a good idea to keep your online profiles and social media accounts as authentic as possible. Your shidduch dating profiles should represent you and not someone you wish to be. If you’re active on social media, take a look at what you’re posting and consider whether or not it’s really you. It’s important to keep your accounts private so your partners have an opportunity to get to know you without sharing details about your personal life.
In conclusion, shidduch dating is a process that takes time, effort, and energy. But, if you follow the do’s and don’ts of a successful relationship, you can increase your chances of finding your bashert. So, take the time to get to know yourself and your potential partner, communicate your wants and needs, and be open to compromise. With these tips in mind, go forth and find your true love!